Totem Pole perspective

Now for a story. When I was in my teen years, I worked at a medical clinic. It was my job to check patients in, get their blood pressure, and ask them how they were at the time of visit.

I called a patient that was in the lobby. She carefully left her seat. She had a limp. She excused herself for being slow.

"I'll get there, it just might take a little time".

I brought her in a room, and picked up her 50 something year old arm to get her heart rate. I looked at her hand. Her large, mangled fingers looked like a curly willow branch. The knots that had once been joints, were swelled to the size of a shooter marble. Some of her fingers were frozen. She wore a large plastic ring on her wedding finger. She was all aglow with smiles. When making small talk, she kept referring to "George". Clearly she loved him, as a special smile graced her face when she said his name.

I asked how she was feeling today. Most times when I asked this, I had people start to cry, or they'd say they were in pain, or didn't want to talk about it. She said she was doing great. I asked what her pain level was (This a a scale from 1-10. 0 being no pain, 10 being the worst pain you've ever had). She said it was a 7. Then she said something great:

"There's always someone lower on the totem pole".

What!?

I asked her what that meant. She told me that each segment of a totem pole, is like a person. There is always someone a little higher than you. There is always somebody a little lower than you. She told me she may have arthritis, but she is alive. She said she was blessed to be in her situation. That she was thankful to be happy (again mentioning George), thankful that she does not have a life-threatening illness, thankful that she can walk and drive herself places. She said "There is too much to be thankful for if anyone just sat down and thought about it".

She explained that things happen that seem bad, but you DECIDE to make them better. Kind of like "When life throws you lemons, make lemonade". She showed me her ring. She said this is the most beautiful ring in the world. I disagreed. It was plastic play jewelry. She said her arthritis had flared and her wedding ring had to be taken off. Her finger continued to swell, and she was never able to put it back on. She was unhappy about it. She and George went to the grocery store one evening. On the way out, there was a machine that had plastic rings for 25 cents. George told her to wait in front of the store. He came out with a ring and put it on her finger. He laughed and said "Here is a new ring for you!' She wore it as long as a knew her.

I must tell you the type of arthritis she had is an auto-immune disorder. People that have it as advanced as she, have a shorter life span. The last couple years they are alive, they are flat on their backs in horrid pain. They often die of infections. And she knew it! Yet...she considered her circumstance blessed.

I have never let this pearl of wisdom leave me. This concludes the story.

Maybe the conclusion of this story is....
"...And they all DECIDED to live happily ever after. The end."

Thank you Diane.